soulmate lady

im used to this... hurting is nothin juz a crack in the heart. 

i shall kip myself busy....

this will not hurt animore... MENS! 

haiz im stupid again. 

cant foresee far....

i give up. 

i shall not cry tonite. juz slp.... 

this is not my 1st relationship.... but this hurt mi as bad....

all must be abt touching n stuff... then they wan to kip u.

i regret that i cry over men. n yes i did again. y m i so stupid! they promise to protect u.. love u! all rubbish! craps! yet again i m fooled! great job rose! so far great! being a loser! 

no one can my soulmate. i will nv give in! nv say how much ego i haf i dun care! i need all that ego hates to kip mi going! to carry on with life! n make mi remind how heartless u can b... no more big promises that u will b my forever. i will nv trust u. i should haf nv trust men! 

all the same! i bet a called tmr, coming over baby? fap urself! i will begin to hate u. like i hate the rest. 

Im dissapointed.....

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Im falling again.... Gosh... Will my heart break again?

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i found you....

book 3 opened!!!

aussie was great! really lovely!!! the pics is like all over! wahahahah

now im wondering... y that ex of mine keep calling mi, and asking my friends ard still.... haiz... wen i call to settle the score! hesay... nth.... i call for nth! fuck! wat the hell!!! cb!

wat should i tell him? wahahaha well actually even his best buddy is asking mi out behide his back! so call best friend! pe je.... but seriously... another story,.... hassan was n were my close friend even during the relationship... heheheh that dun count!

work ok! n sux at the same time! but im not complaining... juz that i think i need some time on my own... but dun noe wen... haiz... wen i need the time... its nt here.... but wen i dun need it... its here! haiz...

wats the haiz... here! wahahahah

fine... u are the king!!!! u always win! cb! nb! fuck off!!!

why pple cant tok among themselve... its sux!!!

do i? i feel so lonely... yes i do. but i noe that i can deal with it. been getting back to my hobbies... reading. trying to adapt to this new author, but its abt love. haiz. so haiz! wat can i say?

the last we chat was like so long... n now im here waiting... didnt reply, didnt call animore!!!! damn!!! y bother rite? if we got serious... mati lah! so y m i here doing nothing ni!!! wahahahaha....

my trip is like in 2weeks time... m i happi? damn i so is... hehehehe juz need my aunt help... sikit. tho that they will sent mi off at the airport... but they cant lah, there is a wedding in malaysia for them. n i dun think so that my family will sent mi off either... all dun seem to bother n worry... should i be sad??? my family is getting further n further tau... i seem to hate my sis to the core!!! fuck!!! y must she do all that!!

n now im feeling freaking down! damn!!!

i been drinking!!! yup! its suck! but ya... so far drinking at the club didnt really do anitin to me. But yesterday... i was wasted!!! by juz drinking two cups! wat the hell....

ppl use to sae, drunk ppl speak the truth... but some gerls juz prefer to hear those nice words from guys that is sober. seriouly... now i can speak my exprecience... i started crying lah!!! rauf was scolding mi all the wae home, y lina... y ros... y dear... y u drink??? before i could reply... i was crying like i use to cry in bed wen my relationship SUX!

wen this is how it start... drinking is o0k.... till u feel so burn... by u survive lah. One cup... ok. then come the second, still doing well. BOOM! Mine eyes start to run focus... n my head get heavy. Once i stand up, there u go... haywire!!! i cant walk properly... kip falling down, but my mind is working. I totally noe wats is happening... wat i say, or shout... eventho the words juz keep coming out I NOE WAT IM SAYING!!! so in the car... rauf dah marah kan... ok... n he is driving at 110km/hr... n i dun bother scolding him like i did to soulmate. i keep quiet. cry n cry... n i start toking... telling him bits here n there... n all he say is "i tho so" wat the hell... is my behavior n mi myself is easy to read??? i dun think so kan....

nevermind that... but i never late for course this morning... hehhehe juz still hangover lah... fazli tompang mi to pcc with his bike... got flat in the way... damn! im fat! wahahahah still feeling the heat in mi... but i eat rice n some juice to kill the drink! haiz...

this course is best lah!!! hehehe i got to play with the taser!!! all my gerls got test n they cry... so i want to try too!!! so i volunter this friday... n all juz look at mi!!! wahahaha

this afternoon i suddenly feel like in jacky chan movie seh...stipping the same props jacky use... heheheh the stripping is best!!! i tho of joing some shooting club in spf... hehehe i love arms n i love them so much that is one of the reason i join PCG! guns!!! 

soulmate is killing mi softly again! haiz... but i dun really bother lah... juz bits here n there make mi blur tau... ask mi bits then... gone... never come back... till like wat ??? days... n still can sambung! wa respect!!! he remember... heheheh 

k lah... bye!

totally hate the pot luck gift... but really thanks!!! at least ade jugak see mi in diff angle wahahaha that calender idea i so wan to find the accused! n thanks to my team guys that they really take care of mi... n worry so much abt mi... danish!!! u gone too much!!! dun bother to say I LOVE YOU! FUCK u!!!